Stutterers around the world celebrate World Stuttering Awareness Day, which is held on October 22 every year. In celebration of World Stuttering Awareness Day, I wanted to share a less-shared perspective on stuttering, specifically, from the perspective of a mother who stutters.
Before I begin, here are some facts about stuttering and stuttering:
1 | About 1% of the world's population stutters. Which is more than 71 million people around the world who stutter.
2 | Stuttering is 3-4 times more common in adult males than in females.
3 | Stuttering usually begins between the ages of 2 and 3.5 (early intervention is important).
As a mom who stutters these truths are mostly on my mind. When I notice the development of articulation skills I have my little ones and I see them trying to repeat the words they hear, I can't help but worry that they might have a speech impediment.
As an adult I finally came to terms with my stuttering and stuttering, but the memories I have of growing up with stuttering are neither pretty nor cute nor do I have anything to do with self-acceptance. I always felt ashamed, lonely, and unworthy, regardless of the support of my family and friends at the time. It took me a long time to get away from the beliefs I had implanted in myself because of how people around me looked at the way I spoke.
I accepted stuttering and I accepted that I stutter!
As a mom who stutters I realize it is not easy to stay calm when I notice any of my children trying to speak and experiencing a speech arrest. I find myself constantly reminding myself and allowing him enough time and space to express himself safely. No matter how long it takes my child to craft the word or who decides to jump into the conversation or tries to finish the sentence about it. I remind myself to be supportive of my children while allowing them to build their own relationship with their own pronunciation.
My wish as a mother (and as someone who stutters) is to enable them to accept themselves as they are; Regardless of what others think of them. To help them realize that all articulations are unique, a blessing some may not understand or relate to but that does not mean it has to be a source of shame or restriction.
I wish with all my heart to be able to empower them with the courage, knowledge and strength to accept their differences.
I hope I don't play a role in making them feel ashamed of their stuttering, and at the same time I hope I don't make it seem so natural that they feel uncomfortable about the way they feel about stuttering. I hope they find safety in opening up with their dad and me about their view of stuttering (or anything else).
The possibility of them stuttering is just one of the many things I worry about as a parent. I wish I could be there for them without any judgment or prejudice either in terms of stuttering or anything they face in life.
Note : All my fears are hypothetical, but notice how much space hypothetical thinking takes up in our minds? Now imagine the effect that would have on our mental health.